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found this on tumblr:

I'm here to tell you how to find your canon patron troll!
John Egbert was born April 13th, which actually makes him an Aries. But Aradia isn't his patron troll, it's Vriska.
Here's why~
April is the 4th month of the year, thus making his birthday 4-13 in those number date things.
Then, you smoosh all the numbers together, and create the number we all know and love! 413! Now put addition signs between each of the numbers. 4+1+3= 8. WOOOAHHH. Who's the 8th sign in the Zodiac? VRISKA. Woah man!

Next, Jade!
Her birthday is December 1st. Which is 12-1. And together 121. 1+2+1= 4. Who's the fourth sign in the Zodiac? Cancer!! Thus Jade's patron troll is Karkat.
Rose:
December 3rd. 12-3. 123. 1+2+3= 6. Virgo is the sixth sign in the Zodiac. Thus, Kanaya is Rose's patron troll.
Dave:
December 4th. 12-4. 124. 1+2+4= 7. Libra is the seventh sign in the Zodiac. Thus, Terezi is Dave's patron troll.
Woah man, did I just blow your mind? I hope so.
This also helps me remember all the kid's birthdays.
Anyway, another example. My birthday is November 11, so 11-11, 1111, 1+1+1+1=4. Thus my patron is Karkat.
Another note, you may get an answer OVER 12! Do not fret, the next step is [A] pulling up your calculator and dividing the sum by 12. If the product is 1.5 or less, your patron is Aradia. If it's 1.6 or higher, it's Tavros. (At least, these are guidelines I go by.)
And for your reference:
1 - Aradia
2 - Tavros
3 - Sollux
4 - Karkat
5 - Nepeta
6 - Kanaya
7 - Terezi
8 - Vriska
9 - Equius
10 - Gamzee
11 - Eridan
12 - Feferi

it makes more sense to me to subtract by 12, so you get the same number, technically. for example, someone born on 9-29 would end up getting 20 (9+2+9=20), which is 12+8, so their canon troll would be the 8th troll, Vriska, instead of dividing by 12 and getting 1.666... and ending up Tavros. this just makes more sense to me, but you can do what you want *shrug*
  • Listening to: my voice
  • Reading: Homestuck & Jane's pesterlogs
  • Playing: Zelda 3DS
Add a Comment:
 
:iconkazekami123:
kazekami123 Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Zodiac: Vriska (Scorpio)
Patron: Equius Zahhak

A COMBINATION OF STRONG AND ALL THE LUCK >:]
Reply
:icondango-addiction:
Dango-Addiction Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2016
Zodiac: Terezi
Patron: Terezi

heehee Terezi Laugh Homestuck Emote 
Reply
:iconlunarlight2503:
LunarLight2503 Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2016  New Deviant Hobbyist Digital Artist
MY PATRON TROLL IS GAMZEE.
SO MUCH NOPE RIGHT HERE.
SO MUCH NOPE.
Reply
:icongalaxia-dreamer:
Galaxia-Dreamer Featured By Owner 18 hours ago  New Deviant Hobbyist General Artist
You're not alone, I have him as a patron troll too.
Reply
:iconthanatosrune07:
ThanatosRune07 Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2016  Student Traditional Artist
Zodiac: Kanaya
Patron: Sollux

IM A DOUBLE BADASS!
Reply
:iconcjsorakid:
cjsorakid Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2016
Zodiac: Gamzee
Patron: Nepeta
That's a little ironic...
Reply
:iconelfdragon345:
Elfdragon345 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
XD


Now you made me sad. ;.;
Reply
:iconlorax845:
lorax845 Featured By Owner Mar 18, 2016  New Deviant
zodiac: nepeta
patron: feferi
(@_@) was not ready for this (bday is 8/13)
Reply
:iconcoral-chan:
coral-chan Featured By Owner Edited Mar 7, 2016  Student General Artist
My zodiac troll is Gamzee and my patron troll is Kanaya
I'm so happy rn// (My birthday is 1/5)
Reply
:iconmedabee:
medabee Featured By Owner Feb 28, 2016
I'm a cancer so who is my patron troll because i'm confused
Reply
:iconcarladafox:
Carladafox Featured By Owner Apr 14, 2016  New Deviant Student Digital Artist
Cancer is Karkat, but the zodiacs have nothing to do with Patron trolls.
Reply
:iconmedabee:
medabee Featured By Owner Apr 19, 2016
Then what IS a patron in laymans terms?
Reply
:iconghoulish-girl:
Ghoulish-Girl Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2016  Student General Artist
Patron:Gamzee (January 9th)
Zodiac: Gamzee

The fuck is wrong with me to attract that kind of company?
Reply
:iconladynanako:
LadyNanako Featured By Owner Feb 13, 2016
I Got....Equius. On One Hand I Don't Take Kindly To Being Given Orders. Ever. On The Other Hand Getting Orders Makes Him HORNY And Since I'm Pretty Dominating I'd Most Likely Just Be Making Him Sweaty All The Time.<_< >_>
Reply
:iconbaamy:
baamy Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2016  New Deviant
zodiac:gamzee     patron:karkatChica is a Boss (Chat Icon)  
Reply
:iconfushigiharu:
FushigiHaru Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Zodiac: Gamzee
Patron: Vriska

Oh shit, yess :3
Reply
:iconpanoramicchestnut:
panoramicChestnut Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2016  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Zodiac: Equius
Patron: Equius
WHAT.
wHAT.
Reply
:iconghoulish-girl:
Ghoulish-Girl Featured By Owner Feb 25, 2016  Student General Artist
Do you, by any chance, like horse dick?
Reply
:iconelfdragon345:
Elfdragon345 Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
O really wish I could save this comment. XD
Reply
:iconprincesssparklegem:
PrincessSparkleGem Featured By Owner Edited Dec 25, 2015  Student Digital Artist

Zodiac- Sollux/Gemini
Patron- Vriska.....

I AM A POWERFUL ASSHOLE FEAR ME
Reply
:iconcolettebrunel179:
ColetteBrunel179 Featured By Owner Edited Dec 19, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Zodiac: Feferi
Patron: Equius
*speechless*

My brother's result:
Zodiac: Eridan
Patron: Eridan
*even more speechless*
Reply
:iconputtytatty:
Puttytatty Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2015  Student Digital Artist
Zodiac: Vriska
Patron: ........................Eridan.......
Oh shit
Reply
:iconzoeynevermore:
ZoeyNevermore Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2015
Zodiac: Nepeta
Patron: Equius
😊
Reply
:iconlilylovesbendrowned:
LilyLovesBENDrowned Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
zodiac: Sollux
Patron: Vriska

Welp.  
Reply
:iconnekogamergirl:
NekoGamerGirl Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2015  Student Writer
Zodiac: Sollux
Patron: Equius

*squints and changes patron to Karkat*
Reply
:iconsefira101:
sefira101 Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Zodiac: Karkat
Patron: Eridan
Well that's an interesting combo x3
Reply
:iconzoo-boers:
Zoo-Boers Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
that makes mine Kanaya! :icongooberplz:
Reply
:iconpallygyrldashie:
PallygyrlDashie Featured By Owner Oct 10, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
this is so confusing holy cow...
my brain doesnt comprehend o-o
Reply
:iconimmarwaffle:
ImmaRwaffle Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I didn't even have to do the math because you used my birthday as the example, September 29th.
Reply
:icontoothpastebeatboxer:
ToothpasteBeatboxer Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
So...
Zodiac troll - Equius
Patron troll (according to this) - Sollux
Reply
:iconfluffycookiewolf:
FluffyCookieWolf Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2015  Student Digital Artist
Birthday: July 9th, so my zodiac is karkat

7+9=16 

12/16=0.75

ARADIA!! :DDouble Pistols and a Wink 
Reply
:iconciel-la-luna:
Ciel-La-Luna Featured By Owner Sep 19, 2015   Digital Artist
Well...
Birthday: May 6th
5 + 6 = 11
Patron = Eridan <3
Reply
:iconwolfdragonwings:
Wolfdragonwings Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Actually, Dave and Rose's birthdays are mixed up here. So, this doesn't really work
Reply
:iconr4shka:
r4shka Featured By Owner Edited Aug 8, 2015  Hobbyist
1+1+8 = 10
Zodiac : Capricorn
Patron Troll : GaMzEe MaKaRa ;o)
Reply
:iconowen450:
owen450 Featured By Owner Aug 11, 2015
wow, sucks to be you
Reply
:iconthe-littlest-ghost:
The-Littlest-Ghost Featured By Owner Aug 5, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I got Aradia no wonder I'm dead inside
Reply
:iconraidkiller:
Raidkiller Featured By Owner Edited Aug 2, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
September 4

9+4=13-12=1
or
9+4=13÷12=1.08

Zodiac: Kanaya
Patron Troll: Aradia

Cool? ...
Reply
:iconluvfluffykittens:
Luvfluffykittens Featured By Owner Jul 28, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
1+1+1+9=12...feferi is my patron troll. (I'm a Scorpio, does that change anything?)
Reply
:iconmeeeeeeee-ee:
Meeeeeeee-ee Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm....uhh. 1st December so. Hey Jade, were the same *highfives Jade if shes there*

Zodiac = Equius (seriously hes kinda ewh no cause sweat n all) FT NFL - Scared Natsu Emoti 
Patron Troll = Karkat (Nyeh, hes noisy and swears like a sailor but hes fine) FT NFL - grumpy Natsu's birth father emoti 

Lol, my sister's zodiac is Cancer, aka Karkat so. haha so funny Icon popo 
Reply
:iconrose6060:
Rose6060 Featured By Owner Jul 19, 2015
March 10th
3-10
310
3 + 1 + 0 = 4 = Karkat

Zodiac: Feferi
Patron Troll: Karkat
Reply
:iconmoon1433:
Moon1433 Featured By Owner Edited Jul 16, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
My birthday is June 21st so..
6 + 2 + 1 = 9
I HAVE EQUIUS?!?!
NOT THAT I AM COMPLAINING BUT HE KINDA SCARES ME
Llama Emoji-07 (Hopeless or Scared) [V1] 
Reply
:iconnekogamergirl:
NekoGamerGirl Featured By Owner Nov 19, 2015  Student Writer
I feel ya
June 12th...
Forever an Equius
Reply
:iconivaciano:
Ivaciano Featured By Owner Jul 15, 2015
My birthday is the 20th of March, so... March 20 3+2+0=5. Nepeta, weee xd
Reply
:iconanimelovez:
AnimeLovez Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
December 18, 1+2+1+8= 12. Feferi!!! Yass!!
Reply
:iconam3tr1ne:
Am3tr1ne Featured By Owner Edited Jul 11, 2015  Student Digital Artist
Zodiac Troll: Feferi
Patron Troll: Kanaya
best pairing of trolls ever yes
omf this is amazing
also i find it funny that vriska is 8
Reply
:iconthegeekbot:
TheGeekBot Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
1+1+1 
< _ >
Reply
:iconpseudonoobda:
PseudonoobDA Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2015  Student Digital Artist
Hmmm... Let's see.

As my birthday is the 13th of January, that would mean... 1+1+3= 5.
My patron troll is Nepeta. 

Fuck yes. Meow Rainbow 
Reply
:iconhaunte-d:
haunte-d Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Birthday: may 18y
5+1+8 = 14
12 + 2 = 14
Zodiac: Tavros
Patron: fUCKING TAVROS HE LP
Reply
:iconam3tr1ne:
Am3tr1ne Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2015  Student Digital Artist
nO TAVROS IS ADORABLE
Reply
:iconhaunte-d:
haunte-d Featured By Owner Aug 1, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
UGH YES HE IS FFFUFKFUKUFKUCK--

BUT LITERALLY

"TAV DID YOU KNOW YOU'RE BOTH MY ZODIAC AND PATRON TROLL"
Reply
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February 3, 2013
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